Purity was a topic of conversation the other night. For me it is one of the topics I have a high opinion on as a woman who has remained pure for over 30 years. At my age the topic of conversation becomes less about how I can respect you as a woman and lead you closer to God and more about how I can defile the physical body that stands before me or how far can we go?
It has made me quite sad over the year as I have dated to see that the value for holding to what the Bible calls sacred, holy, pure (I think it uses those words) become almost non existent. The urges I see lead more to the bedroom then they do to the Bible.
It got me thinking of purity in all realms of life. One in particular popped into my head. Am I being pure and honoring my relationships with the opposite sex? Not my dating relationships as I am single but in my male friendships. Do I honor them? Am I keeping them pure and protecting their purity? Am I being appropriate with them? Do we have healthy boundaries? Often people or events in my life cause me to stop and take a look inside as to what I think how and how I believe. I used to be someone that thought only one way was right and that was my way. Then I realized there are people that are different then me that might have a view worth exploring.
Does this mean I am going to change my bathing suit choice? Probably not. Do I see flirting as inappropriate? Not if you are single and interested in the person as long as it is done tastefully and respectfully. But do I as a woman need to ensure my behavior isn't misleading to someone I am not interested in getting to know better? Absolutely! Is it just as much my responsibility to create healthy boundaries in my friendships of the opposite sex to protect their hearts from any misleading if no interest is there? YES!
Dating these days is hard. What has become harder is finding someone you connect with, have similar theological equality with and have the same or similar physical boundaries with among other things. Yet it is so easy for us to start emotional relationships not just physical ones based off of connections. But are you remaining pure and protected by starting an emotional relationship with someone with no intentions stated? My solution to this problem? State your intentions. If you are interested just say it. Even if it is just interested in getting to know them better to see if there is a potential. Forwardness and persistence are appreciated. It also protects your heart as well as theirs. We in the Christian culture have made too much out of dating, put too much pressure on it. Thus it has not given men the freedom to pursue. (I could go on all day about this but I feel like I have rabbit trailed sorry about that.)
But purity is more than making sure you don't have sex. It is making sure that you never allow it to get there. That boundaries are set physically and emotionally. That the Lord means more than a slip up or a relationship had that was undefined it is about your faith and devotion to Christ is above all and where and what He leads you into.
We not only are called to keep ourselves physically pure but mentally and emotionally. So I ask the same question I ask myself...How you doing with that?
It has made me quite sad over the year as I have dated to see that the value for holding to what the Bible calls sacred, holy, pure (I think it uses those words) become almost non existent. The urges I see lead more to the bedroom then they do to the Bible.
It got me thinking of purity in all realms of life. One in particular popped into my head. Am I being pure and honoring my relationships with the opposite sex? Not my dating relationships as I am single but in my male friendships. Do I honor them? Am I keeping them pure and protecting their purity? Am I being appropriate with them? Do we have healthy boundaries? Often people or events in my life cause me to stop and take a look inside as to what I think how and how I believe. I used to be someone that thought only one way was right and that was my way. Then I realized there are people that are different then me that might have a view worth exploring.
Does this mean I am going to change my bathing suit choice? Probably not. Do I see flirting as inappropriate? Not if you are single and interested in the person as long as it is done tastefully and respectfully. But do I as a woman need to ensure my behavior isn't misleading to someone I am not interested in getting to know better? Absolutely! Is it just as much my responsibility to create healthy boundaries in my friendships of the opposite sex to protect their hearts from any misleading if no interest is there? YES!
Dating these days is hard. What has become harder is finding someone you connect with, have similar theological equality with and have the same or similar physical boundaries with among other things. Yet it is so easy for us to start emotional relationships not just physical ones based off of connections. But are you remaining pure and protected by starting an emotional relationship with someone with no intentions stated? My solution to this problem? State your intentions. If you are interested just say it. Even if it is just interested in getting to know them better to see if there is a potential. Forwardness and persistence are appreciated. It also protects your heart as well as theirs. We in the Christian culture have made too much out of dating, put too much pressure on it. Thus it has not given men the freedom to pursue. (I could go on all day about this but I feel like I have rabbit trailed sorry about that.)
But purity is more than making sure you don't have sex. It is making sure that you never allow it to get there. That boundaries are set physically and emotionally. That the Lord means more than a slip up or a relationship had that was undefined it is about your faith and devotion to Christ is above all and where and what He leads you into.
We not only are called to keep ourselves physically pure but mentally and emotionally. So I ask the same question I ask myself...How you doing with that?
No comments:
Post a Comment